Divorce

You can fall out of love, but can you fall back into it? Many people think that the reason others get divorced is because they no longer love each other, and that is why we have so many in our day. Up to 50% right? Wrong. The reality is that 75% of everyone who gets married stays married. Some of the reasons however that people get divorced are these:

• Low socioeconomic status
• low income
• Cohabitated before-more like tying a bow than a knot. The latter is harder to undo. 
• Divorced once before
• Parents were divorced

There are six stations of divorce. Emotional Divorce: When a couple no longer feels emotionally attached to the other, they separate. Legal Divorce: A couple meets with the court and legally decides to end the marriage. Economic Divorce: Both parties get equal amount of econmic support. Cooparental Divorce: When both parents get rights to the children. Community Divorce: When the couple's divorce is known by their community, and sides are chosen, and Physic Divorce.

After about 2 years, there are three different things that happen to 70% of divorced people: They regret that it happened, men tend to remarry faster than women, and then 5 years after both parties have adjusted and gotten through it.

Effects of Divorce on Children
There are many negative effects that divorce has on children. These include:

• They have to choose between parents.
• Tend to a mediator between parents.
• They're school work falters.
• They try harder to please their parents.
• They receive a loss of resources-or loss of access to one of their parents.
• Sometimes parentification can occur-When a parent uses an older child as a confidant.
• Children sometimes blame themselves for divorce.
• 60% of children live with people other than their parents.
• Boys have more problems generally because they spend more time with mom rather than their dad.

Sometimes divorce is necessary. But for those who are able to work through it, I encourage you to do so.

Children: Are they REALLY an inheritance unto the Lord?

Imagine you are the proud parent of two teenage daughters. One of them is very energetic, constantly demands your attention, and getting into trouble. The other is more passive, keeps to herself, and rarely misbehaves. One day, you are running around, trying to get everything done, and realize you forgot to pick up something for dinner. You can’t find the car keys, so you grab the spare, and run out the door. Only to find that one of your daughter’s took the car to the mall. How do you react? Do you wait until your daughter gets home in order to yell at her, or do you shrug your shoulders, nonchanlantly, and choose something else to make for dinner? Or, do you wait for your daughter to get home and have a discussion about when it is ok for her to take the car, and that you already had set rules for when she would be allowed to use it?

Depending on your answer will determine what parenting style you are most likely to use. There are three, but only two were mentioned this week. Authoritarian, Passive, and Authoritative.

Authoritarian: Also known as the dictator. These parents demand that their children obey and respect them, without having to give respect in return.

Passive: These parents feel that it is better for their children to learn through doing whatever feels right to them. They tend to take a backseat approach to parenting.

Authoritative: These parents discuss rules with their children, as well as consequences, and determine together what needs to happen when misbehavior occurs. They also expect to give respect when respect is given to them.

Children are “an heritance unto the Lord” and deserve to be raised by parents who are knowledgeable and understand how to teach them to become functioning members of society. In today’s world, it is becoming more and more popular for parents to leave their children to be taught and raised by babysitters, teachers, and technology. Let us do our best so that we may one day be able to stand confidently before God, and know that we helped his child to become the best that they could be in this life.

Food for thought: If the spirits God is sending to Earth don’t come to us, where do they go?