Marriage and Children What are we getting ourselves into?

I learned SO much this week! We learned about how to adjust to marriage, and how to adjust when children come. Many of the things that I especially liked were the little things that we need to adjust to, such as different internal clocks (some people are morning people, while others are night owls) as well as sleeping in the same bed, some people (like me) get cold really easy, while others have a really high body temperature. I found that one really funny, because I can guarantee my future husband will probably want to sleep as far away from me as he can so he doesn't sweat to death. One of the other adjustments I found interesting was different eating habits. As a future wife, I want to be able to cook good meals for my husband, and have him enjoy them. If we both have different eating habits, that's going to be really hard. As well as finding things to do when I need my alone time. We also talked about how people who are major gamers don't have very successful marriages, because they don't have the same interaction with each other as other couples do, using games to connect rather than being physically together.

Adjusting to children
I have recently seen a friend go through some hard adjustments to the birth of her first child. Many times, women end up taking care of the child, and the husband feels left out and underappreciated, becuase he is no longer getting all of the attention, and doesn't know how to interact with the newborn child, seeing it as the main responsibility of the wife. The wife in turn, feels like she is the expert at child rearing, and doesn't allow the husband to get involved, many times turning to her own mother for assistance. Some of the things that we learned in order to help both the father and mother feel more involved and appreciated with the before, during, and after process's of the birth of a new baby were these:

What are five specific things wives can do to engage their husbands fully before, during and after delivery of their child?

•        Involve husband in prenatal checkups
• • Prenatal bonding events
  • Husband takes precedence over others
  • Shared responsibilities
  • Creative ways for husband to bond
• What are five things a husband can do to engage fully before, during and after their child is born?
• Plan carefully for changes
• Don’t forget spouse’s needs
• Boost/support
• Take turns with tasks
• Express love/appreciation